Teenagers’ Take on Relocation: Tips for Moving with Teens
So, for you it may be a matter of progress and betterment after your last promotion or your new job or after you bought a –new house, not every member of the family is happy by the fact that they have to move out to a much better place but a much unknown place.
Moving or relocation has a lot of hidden greys amongst the distinctive bands of black and white. While relocation service is generally the aftermath of growth, success, and opulence, not always can we expect every member of the house to be happy with the news of relocation. So, for you it may be a matter of progress and betterment after your last promotion or your new job or after you bought a –new house, not every member of the family is happy by the fact that they have to move out to a much better place but a much unknown place.
Not every butterfly wants to leave the comfort of the small yet protective cocoon that has been their comfort zone for several years together; especially if that butterfly is a teenager! We need to think about the facts why t is so difficult to move with teens in the family. Here are a few probable reasons:
Teenagers find it very difficult to let go:
Most of the teenagers, who have spent their childhood in a particular house, a particular neighborhood, and went to school in the same locale, will definitely have cherished friendships, academic activities, careers, family bonding, and unending memories of childhood and growing up. It is very difficult for them to let go of their emotional quotient related to their home. Hence, it is most teenagers find the thought of relocation as something earth-shattering.
Teenagers find it difficult due to their careers:
After the schooling period is over, the college days take over. The schooling period is the time when elementary and miscellaneous knowledge is imparted and there is less segregation on the career front. In the case of college academics, it is a specialized and streamlined method of imparting knowledge and building careers. Teenagers in college find it harder to move to other cities in the midst of their careers. Hence, relocation also affects their mid-way change in the academic front.
Teenagers find it very difficult to cope with:
After relocation, teenagers find it very difficult to cope with the new surroundings. It is very obvious for an individual to be able to adjust emotionally, socially, and academically in a completely new setting. Emotionally they have to deal with the fact that they are out of their comfort zone with a lot of memories about their friends and loved ones whom they left behind. Socially they have to mix with the new people there or else they fear that they might be treated as an outcast. Academically they are already marked as the new students of the class and they fear that they might have to constantly prove their worth amongst their peers.
Teenagers often end up depressed:
Teenage is the most vulnerable phase of our lives. Teenagers exhibit both a very sensitive and a gullible state of mind. More often than not, they fall prey to peer pressure and emotional abuse. They are not very good at handling reticence or rejections. Not all teenagers after relocation can adjust emotionally, socially, and academically to the new habitat and often end up feeling depressed. There is a lot on their plate and they find the extreme level of peer pressure and the fear of being judged takes over. Extreme cases of anxiety and depression result in drug abuse, self-harming disorders, and even suicidal tendencies.
We need to think of lessening stress and anxiety in teenagers caused due to the sudden relocating phenomenon. Here are a few factors which may ease the process:
Preparation is the key:
Inform the teenager about the move much in advance. The individual should be able to have enough time to figure out his future in new surroundings in advance. The sooner you break the news of the relocation, the better it is for the vulnerable mind to imagine the probabilities of a new beginning. There is no need to rush or forcefully thrust your decision to relocate on a teenager. Hear them out and try to put yourself in their shoes. Make them feel that their struggle is being validated. This feeling of empathy will calm them and maybe they will find a piece of comfort in the chaos.
Make the new house their home:
Half the war is won if you can shift the home and not just the house. Every teenager has a world of their own that they have been building with memories since their childhood. That scribbly artwork of Spiderman from the first standard that you got framed, some posters that have been put up on the cupboard door for ages, the beloved soft-toy that they have been keeping by the bed-side as if it is a part of the headboard now, the cricket bat that got completely worn-out, the faded sofa on which your child has been lazily reading story-books from the school library, all of this may be complete junk to an adult but priceless possession to a teenager. Carry them along and your teenager may feel comfort in seeing his old friend in his new house.
Old is gold in case of friendship:
Friendship is one bond that requires no parameters of validation, be it social, legal, or economic. Some of the most valued and trusted friendships are the ones we make in our early years. Friends are our biggest source of influence, our secret-keepers, our cheerleaders, our support in times of sorrow, and our reason to smile. If your teenage child is unable to cope with the new surroundings, let them bounce back to life with the help of their old friends. We can’t be thankful enough for the new technologies of video-calling which have helped us to stay so close to our loved ones. Sending customized gifts and regular telephonic checking on each other can help a teenager with a smooth emotional transition after relocation.
Seek professional help when in need:
The mind of a teenager is like water, it seeks its own level. So, it is most likely that your teenage child will find a friend, an ally who shares a similar mental frequency. He adjusts slowly but certainly to his new periphery and feels accepted. Well, that’s an ideal case and not everything goes as it’s planned. A lot of times, things go out of control and your precious child may land up with severe psychotic disturbances or drug abuse. This is a situation that requires medical and professional help as any wrong message sent out through your speech or behavior can cause a backfire in their mental health. Do not hesitate to ask for medical help as many times we do not address our mental health as significantly as our physical health.
Teenage is the phase of our lives when we transition from childhood to adulthood. It is an amalgamation of having a heart of a child and having a mind of an adult, having a soul of a child and a physique of an adult, having impulsive immaturities as well as careerist goals at the same time. For a teenager, it is always a game of head versus heart controlled by hormones, reflexes as well as ethics, and social norms. Two personalities reside in the same body of a teenager and all you see in that chaos runs in their veins. Relocation is a big change in the life of a teenager and it needs to be addressed with patience, compassion, and love, a lot of love.